Transformation

As I walked the woods today I am aware if my own transformation. I came to Mt. Irenaeus almost a dozen years ago. In that time I have slowly been transformed to a more loving person. I’m not even aware of it most of the time. That is not to say that I’m never irked or peeved, but I’m capable of more love than I was and that’s because I love myself more. I’ve forgiven and accepted myself which is so vital to transformation and it’s come about not due to my own striving or efforts. I have become still and let God do the work.

The Pond

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Still water is attractive to me. There is quiet there. This small pond at Mt. Irenaeus is so inviting that I spent nearly an hour there last Sunday. Today I’m hiking further up the Mountain Road. The stillness of Mt. Irenaeus restores my soul each week. I love people and I love solitude. I am reminded again of Thomas Merton.

“Out here in the woods I can think of nothing except God. It is not so much that I think of Him as I am as aware of Him as I am of the sun and the clouds and the blue sky and the thin cedar trees…Engulfed in the simple and lucid actuality of the afternoon — I mean God’s afternoon — this sacramental moment of time when the shadows will get longer and longer, and one small bird sings quietly in the cedars, one car goes by in the remote distance, and the oak leaves move in the wind.

High up in the summer sky I watch the silent flight of a vulture, and the day goes by in prayer. This solitude confirms my call to solitude. The more I am in it, the more I love it. One day it will possess me entirely and no man will ever see me again.
~Thomas Merton, A Search for Solitude

Abbey time

It’s Labor Day and tomorrow we begin another school year. I’m excited and frightened too. 30 new 7th Grade students some of whom I know some of whom I don’t. I have some ideas And direction this year but some still unsettled. Therefore I have come here to listen with the ear of my heart to what I might hear in the silence of this sacred place. I covet your prayers too as I really am uncertain of just what and how to teach technology to this group of youngsters. I want to have a project learning approach but I’ve never done that per se before. One of my favorite Rumi quotes is, “sell your cleverness and purchase bewilderment.” I have purchased bewilderment and it frightens me.

Along the E-r-I-e

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Along this waterway my great-grandparents came in the 1880’s. They couldn’t speak English too well and they came in search of a better life. They came from Anglesey Island in North Wales. My Grandmother was their youngest. She was born after they settled at Henpeck near present day Sandusky, New York. Every time I see the Erie Canal I think of them and how uncertain their lives were. Grandpa became a US citizen in 1902, four years after my Grandma was born. Great-grandma never did become a citizen. In the pre-social insurance days there was no need. Like all immigrants they were discriminated against. That legacy invites me to welcome others who come here.

“You shall not wrong or oppress a resident alien, for you were aliens in the land of Egypt.” – Exodus 22:21

Holy Ghost

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Curiosity got the best of me and I had to see where our son will be married in a bit over a month. I pray a lot and especially for the children. When Devin first moved to the Rochester area a little over 5 years ago I prayed that Our Lady would watch over him and protect him. I prayed too that he would meet a young lady who would bring wholeness to his life. Both of those prayers have been abundantly answered. But, until today I’d never been to the church where they will be married. There in front of me as I turned off the road is the Holy Ghost Church & a shrine to Our Lady of Lourdes. How prophetic, beautiful and fitting is that. Ave Maria gratia plena.

Resting place

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In the quiet of my favorite hermitage at Mt. Irenaeus I come for rest and renewal. In these quiet woods I have walked upon wet leaves and enjoyed the fragrance of peace that surrounds everything here.

“Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest.” -Matthew 11:28.

Here at La Posada I have come to rest.

The Rain

It’s raining and every time it rains like this I think of Thomas Merton. It’s so peaceful when it rains. I feel protected and close to my creator.

“I came up here from the monastery last night, sloshing through the cornfield, said Vespers, and put some oatmeal on the Coleman stove for supper. It boiled over while I was listening to the rain and toasting a piece of bread at the log fire. The night became very dark. The rain surrounded the whole cabin with its enormous virginal myth, a whole world of meaning, of secrecy, of silence, of rumor. Think of it: all that speech pouring down, selling nothing, judging nobody, drenching the thick mulch of dead leaves, soaking the trees, filling the gullies and crannies of the wood with water, washing out the places where men have stripped the hillside! What a thing it is to sit absolutely alone, in the forest, at night, cherished by this wonderful, unintelligible, perfectly innocent speech, the most comforting speech in the world, the talk that rain makes by itself all over the ridges, and the talk of the watercourses everywhere in the hollows!” — Thomas Merton

Humility

This is one of my favorite quotes from a very spiritual man.

“”Perpetual quietness of heart. It is to have no trouble. It is never to be fretted or vexed, irritable or sore; to wonder at nothing that is done to me, to feel “Perpetual quietness of heart. It is to have no trouble.
It is never to be fretted or vexed, irritable or sore;
to wonder at nothing that is done to me, to feel nothing
done against me. It is to be at rest when nobody praises
me, and when I am blamed or despised, it is to have a
blessed home in myself where I can go in and shut the door and kneel to my Father in secret and be at peace, as in a deep sea of calmness, when all around and about is seeming trouble.” nothing done against me. It is to be at rest when nobody praises me, and when I am blamed or despised, it is to have a blessed home in myself where I can go in and shut the door and kneel to my Father in secret and be at peace,
as in a deep sea of calmness, when all around and about is seeming trouble.” — Robert H. Smith

Feast of the Assumption

Today I rose early for a trip to Erie, PA for another certification test. This one for School Building Leader credentials. I studied the preparation materials and committed some information to memory as best I could using some of the techniques I learned while reading, “Moonwalking with Einstein,” by Joshua Foer. I climbed in the RAV4 while it was still dark and drove the 100 plus miles to Erie. As I drove I thought of the Magnificat.

My soul doth magnify the Lord.
And my spirit hath rejoiced in God my Saviour.
Because he hath regarded the humility of his handmaid;
for behold from henceforth all generations shall call me blessed.
Because he that is mighty,
hath done great things to me;
and holy is his name. — Magnificat

I thought of Our Lady and the devotion I have for her. I thought of how often she has protected me and guided me with the gentle touch of a mother. Today, I prayed the Magnificat often as I made my way to Erie in the pre-dawn. I believe I did well on the examination today and I have renewed faith in myself and respect for the test creators and for the testing industry in general. Today was a transformational day for me. I’m grateful for tests as they have helped me to learn even though my frustration with the process had reached a fever pitch last week. Thank you to all who may have prayed for me and for an answer to my own prayers. When I finished the examination and made my way to Barnes & Noble near Millcreek Mall for a well deserved cup of coffee and a cookie I thought of the Latin version of the Magnificat and I recited it too in thanksgiving for my good fortune today.

Magnificat: anima mea Dominum.
Et exultavit spiritus meus: in Deo salutari meo.

Repairer of Broken Walls

Today I received an email from one of my relatives which caused me to look again at one of my favorite quotes from the Book of Isaiah. There are many who decry what has happened to our society and our country and some are quick to blame the President, Congress and each other. We have become a land of malicious talk. A few days ago it began in earnest with the debt ceiling talks, now the Iowa Caucus, and it just keeps getting more malicious. Isaiah points the way to a new consciousness which is really very old if you consider how many years ago Isaiah lived.

“If you do away with the yoke of oppression,
with the pointing finger and malicious talk,
and if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry
and satisfy the needs of the oppressed,
then your light will rise in the darkness,
and your night will become like the noonday.
The LORD will guide you always;
he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land
and will strengthen your frame.
You will be like a well-watered garden,
like a spring whose waters never fail.
Your people will rebuild the ancient ruins
and will raise up the age-old foundations;
you will be called Repairer of Broken Walls,
Restorer of Streets with Dwellings.” — Isaiah 58: 10-12

Doing away with malicious talk and spending ourselves on behalf of the hungry and oppressed in our midst is a guarantee of the satisfaction of our needs. Radical teaching in a world gone mad.