Lunch

Today I decided to drive over to Mt. Irenaeus to check on some records necessary for an upcoming regional visitation for our Secular Franciscan Fraternity. When I at the Mountain I checked in at the House of Peace with Sr. Beth, a Stella Niagara Franciscan, who was working in the kitchen preparing lunch for she and Fr. Dan Hurley, OFM. She invited me to join them and so I did. I hadn’t gone there expecting lunch. We ate left-overs which at Mt. Irenaeus can be sumptuous. We dined at the table on the screened in porch and Fr. Dan blessed our meal. My eyes misted over as Dan Hurley asked the Lord to bless our meal. I hadn’t come here expecting a blessing or even a meal but that is what I got. After lunch I went and checked our records and decided to walk the labyrinth and spend some quiet time in the chapel. By the time I’d completed the labyrinth, Br. Joe Kotula, OFM had arrived and following some quiet time in the chapel I joined he, Sr. Beth and Fr. Dan Hurley at the house for a short time. Going to the Mountain was just what I needed today.

Excitement

Yesterday I got news that I’d been accepted into the M.S. in Educational Leadership at St. Bonaventure University. I am beginning a course of study which I hope will prove interesting and provide me with needed professional growth. September 4, 1957 as a four year old boy I entered a Franciscan institution. Now, fifty-two years later I’m doing the same thing. I was excited then and I’m excited now. The most poignant memory I have of 1957 is riding the bus to that school. In the ensuing nine years I became a graduate of St. Piux X School in Delevan, New York and was formed and informed by the Franciscan Sisters of Allegany. Little did I know what a profound effect they had on my life.

Much has changed in the past fifty years but the values that have formed my life came from my parents and those tireless Allegany Franciscan Sisters. It was they who taught me to read and what a gift that has been to a curious fellow like me. it was those sisters and later Franciscan friars at Archbishop Walsh in Olean who would animate my life in ways that I never imagined. I remember sitting in study hall as a high school freshman looking west at the tiled roofs of the campus of St. Bonaventure University. I remember following the St. Bonaventure basketball team. Bob Lanier, Bill Kalbaugh, Paul Hoffman, Matt Gantt and Greg Gary stirred my young imagination. I attended only one game at the Reilly Center in 1967 but, I often followed their exploits on my AM radio. I watched the “Big Cat” and his mates subdue the Purdue Boilermakers on television with my Dad and brother.

Much of my life has centered around St. Bonaventure and now I’m a student. I’m enrolled in a program that will see me attending classes at St. Bonaventure’s Buffalo center at Hilbert College and taking much of the course of study on-line. I’m not sure what to expect, but I’m excited nonetheless.

Merton on solitude

Earlier today I took a canoe onto the lake where we are staying and maybe it’s because I had ridden in motorized craft a lot this trip, but it was very refreshing to be paddling along in a still cove. I think there is a lot more to solitude than prayer or maybe it’s that contemplation leads to an awareness or state of mind that begets solitude and that solitude begins to infuse all that I am. It’s more than interior silence. It’s a state of being. As Ii paddled I began to recite, “Hail Mary full of grace, the Lord is with you.”

Solitude as act: the reason no one understands solitude, or bothers to try to understand it, is that it appears to be nothing but a condition. Something one elects to undergo, like standing under a cold shower. Actually, solitude is a realization, an actualization, even a kind of creation, as well as a liberation of active forces within us, forces that are more than our own, and yet more ours that what appears to be “ours”. As a mere condition, solitude can be passive, inert and basically unreal: a kind of permanent coma. One has to work at it to keep out of this condition. One has to work actively at solitude, not by putting fences around oneself but by destroying all the fences and throwing away all the disguises and getting down to the naked root of one’s inmost desire, which is the desire of liberty-reality. To be free from the illusion that reality creates when one is out of right relation to it, and to be real in the freedom which reality gives when one is rightly related to it.

Thomas Merton. Learning to Love, Journals Volume 6, Christine M. Bochen, editor (San Francisco: HarperSanFrancisco, 1997): 320-321.I used to

Lake Murray

We’ve been spending the last few days in sunny South Carolina thanks to the hospitality of my brother and his family. It’s been thirteen years since our last visit to Lake Murray. It is a lovely lake and a wonderful experience heightened by the fact that it’s something we don’t get to do as much as we used to. Eleven us of sharing the same home, waterfront, dock and water-craft. We’ve spent an entire summer in Western New York where we’ve been hard pressed to have two consecutive days of sunshine. Here the sun is present everyday and the air temperatures hover in the mid-ninety’s and water temperatures in the high eighties. Mom is with us too. We’re all getting older but Mom is the oldest at eighty-two. She’s been a little sick and she’s getting frail. We spent many summers at the ocean as youngsters and Mom was there swimming and watching us to make sure we didn’t wander too far into the Atlantic surf. Now we her children watch her to make sure that her needs are met. It’s great to have her along. It’s great too to be with our immediate family. It’s been a half-dozen years since we were on a family vacation. Our family, my brother’s family and my sister and her husband too. This is a special time and one that I’ll remember for a long time.

Epiphany

Maybe most people already knew this and maybe I’m just catching up but Daniel Pink’s book has been a real insight for me.  What chance that I would take a picture of the labyrinth at Mt. Irenaeus, upload it with my Blackberry to Facebook an that it would invite a conversation that would lead me to read and listen to “A Whole New Mind.” If people like me will rule the future that’s great, but its less important to me than the fact that this book and some of the concepts in it help explain a lot about me that had puzzled me for years.

My brother is very left brained at least according to the book. He’s even got an MBA. I enrolled in an MBA program a couple of years ago and then un-enrolled before classes started because the whole idea of learning about what was being offered really didn’t appeal to me. I’ve always been the dreamer and the contemplative. I read Carlos Castaneda thirty-five years ago when few had heard of him. I remember reading Sri Chinmoy, Edgar Cayce and other mystics when I was serving in the US Navy.  It is simply amazing to have this book handed to me as it were as I’m ready to embark on more graduate learning. The program I’m entering would seem to be more left brain oriented but my own approach to learning and even educational leadership is decidedly right brained according to Daniel Pink. Whatever the outcome of my studies “A Whole New Mind” has set me on a path to look at myself and life itself with a whole new set of eyes.

Contralateral or what?

“A Whole New Mind,” has given me a lot of whole new thoughts which I find enjoyable. I like learning new things and being exposed to new ideas. One the terms that Dan Pink uses early on in the book is “contralateral” which means that functions on the left side of the body are controlled by the right brain and right side functions by the left part of the brain.  The left brain is more about analytical thinking and the right brain more about high touch.  Right brainers are more in touch with the feminine aspects of their personalities and left brainers are more into the masculine side.  Could it be that gay people are more in touch with the feminine side? I’m not gay, but I’m decidedly more right brained and I’m decidedly more accepting of gay people and gay culture than some of my friends. I’m not sure that my premise is valid, but it’s a thought I’ve had in the wake of reading the book.

One of Pink’s premises is that right brain oriented people are what our economy is looking for. It’s the left brainers, the MBAs who are the new blue collars. The “artsy-fartsy” people as Pink calls them are ascendant. If Dan Pink is correct then the future belongs to women and those men more in touch with their feminine side. The future belongs to gay folks or at least their sexual orientation might pre-suppose them for success. It’s just a thought.

A whole new paradigm

Wednesday night found my wife and I on our way to Mt. Irenaeus for an Evening of Re-Creation. Diane doesn’t usually accompany me and so having her along was special for a number of reason. We were a bit late getting there in time for the Mass that began Wednesday’s evening. As we walked from the parking lot near Holy Peace Chapel we passed by the labyrinth. I pulled my Blackberry out, snapped a picture and shared it on Facebook with my friends. We enjoyed our evening very much. When I returned home and logged into Facebook I could see that two of my friends had commented on the picture of the labyrinth. One expressed delight and the other mentioned that Daniel Pink mentions labyrinths in his book, “A Whole New Mind.” I respect both of my friends a great deal and so a conversation is begun about the labyrinth and Dan Pink.

I did some googling and became interested in purchasing “A Whole New Mind.” At work the next day another of my friends had seen the picture and discussion too and she volunteers some insights which further pique my interest in both labyrinths and Pink’s book. Rick offered to bring the book to work the next day, but when I get home on Thursday, curiosity gets the best of me and I decided to purchase the book from iTunes and so that’s what happens. I began listening to the book immediately and in short it’s been great to listen to. In fact much of my experience with the collaborative nature of this story is very right brained. I’m amazed too that my own experience at Mt. Irenaeus and my spiritual journey have left me advantaged once again. In the past almost ten years I’ve become increasingly aware that I’m a contemplative and a mystic, so Dan Pink’s book resonated very much with what I’ve experienced at the Mountain and elsewhere.

The very first labyrinth I ever experienced was at the Franciscan Renewal Center in Scottsdale, AZ.  A year or so later the friars built the labyrinth at Mt. Irenaeus. In that time I’ve found myself walking both of them at different times and each time I found the experience grounding. Pink’s primary premise is that success today comes from a right brained paradigm. Labyrinths promote or facilitate right brained thinking which may hold the keys to success in today’s marketplace and society.

I highly recommend “A Whole New Mind,” it’s a very interesting book with  great insights.  Pink’s book has led me to topics like Laughter Yoga and more reading on labyrinths and how they are being used in hospitals and schools. Here is a great link to a virtual labyrinth at Grace Cathedral.  I’ve lalso learned of Martin Seligman’s Authentic Happiness site.

How did all of this happen? It was a smartphone photo sent to Facebook which invited a collaborative response or responses. These technologies didn’t exist five or ten years ago and like Dan Pink’s book they make possible changes in the way we work and learn. Maybe we should change schools and teaching in general to a more right brained paradigm.

Excuses to listen

Sunday I purchased a new book for my new iPod Touch. It’s “Excuses be Gone,” by Wayne Dyer. Like Dyer’s other books its chocked full of good insights many of which I’ve heard elsewhere b, ut he has such a great delivery it’s better to listen to the book than read it for me. In the past couple of years I’ve listened to more books than I’ve read thank to Apple’s i-Tunes Store. I actually wish that more books came this way. Reading is fun, but with an audible book I can take it anywhere. I can listen in the car, while I’m walking, even when I’m laying down for a nap. I really like my new i-Pod Touch which I got for buying my son a new MacBook. I got a rebate for the entire price of the i-Pod just for buying the Mac. I’m still a Ubuntu user and probably will be, but each of our children now own MacBooks. I highly recommend Dr. Dyer’s book and I recommend you listen to it. I’ve found that listening to books is helpful and I can listen again and again. Listening to Dr. Dyer’s positive affirmations help to program my computer for success.

Dad

A few days ago I stood above his grave and looked down at the Veterans Administration plaque that marks the spot where’s he’s lain for the past thirty-six years. He missed a lot of life by dying at 46. Dad is my namesake and there are many things about us that are similar. I bear his name and some say his looks. Looking like your father is not a stretch. He was an intense individual who like me wore his heart on his sleeve. I remember the last time I saw him and the last time I hugged him. We were standing in the terminal in Arcata, CA. It was late February 1973 and I was preparing to be assigned a permanent duty station by the US Navy. There had been a rift, some resentments between us and I almost wasn’t going to come to California where he and Mom were living at the time. I’m glad I did go. I’m glad that I flew to see him one last time. As we stood in the terminal my flight taxied into view and the attendant came to the door to beckon us to board this Hughes Air turbo-prop that was waiting. There was a lump in my throat and I’m sure there was one in his. I was trying to be brave like most 20 year old kids do. He put his arm around and gave me a big hug and told me that he was crying. I was crying too. Neither of us said, “I love you,” but it was there as big as life itself. I turned and walked to the plane and watched from window as he and Mom stood there and waited for the plane to taxi.

Thirty-six years ago tonight our Executive Officer came to the newborn nursery where I was working the afternoon shift. He asked me to come to his office. When he sat me down, he told me that Dad had died that afternoon in California. He told me he was sorry and that I could be relieved of my duty that night if I wanted to. I elected to stay and work. He told me to go to the personnel office in the morning and they would have emergency leave papers ready for me and a car would take me to the Albany, GA metropolitan airport where I would begin my journey home. I remember the kindness of my shipmates and how one guy, a dental technician, Bill Kirkland offered his Datsun 240Z to make the drive home. I’ve never forgotten that.

A year never goes by that I don’t remember Dad on this day. This morning a smile crossed my face as I though of one of his humorous metaphors which I occasionally share with friends and colleagues. He was a treasure trove of metaphors and similes. I’ve inherited some of those expressions from him. Time has healed the grief although there are times like this morning when I wish I had one more hour or one more day just to catch up. I see him in both our son and daughter. I see him in my brother and sister. I see him in my uncle, his brother, who will soon be ninety-two. I remember him often and as long as I live he will continue to live within me.

Bubba

This teddy bear has been part of the family for almost fifteen years now. Originally purchased as a Christmas gift for Dara when she was in elementary school.   Dara named him Bubba. About five years ago when we moved to our present home he was excessed and I took him to school and donated him to the Kindergarten classes. He was home there for a few years until I discovered him in the throw-away pile a couple of years ago. I rescued him and put him in my office on the top shelf where he lived for the next almost two years until one of my co-workers suggested I put him in the car as he’d make my vehicle eligible for the HOV lane. That humorous suggestion landed him in the car for the last two months. This weekend my son suggested he needed a bath and so today Bubba got a Lysol bath and he’s soaking up the sun in an effort to make him even more loveable.

Once he’s ready I’ll put him back in the car where I’ve enjoyed having him as he brings an occasional smile to the faces of folks who see him on the highways of our area. I don’t know what there is about teddy bears, but I’ve loved them all my life. I have a collection at the house and I even have a footstool that looks like a bear cub. Some wags have suggested that I’ve been riding around with a bear behind.